Just When You Need A Knitting Needle...

A conversation in a charity shop on Saturday.

Us: Do you have any rollerskates?
Old Woman: (apologetically) Oh no, they're far too dangerous for us to sell...
Us: Ah! (we turn to leave)
Old Woman: (Interupting us mid "Ah") You wouldn't believe how long the list of banned things is...
Us: Oh? (we turn back automatically)
Old Woman: (just getting started) Do you know we're not even allowed to sell knitting needles because the kids come in and buy them, take them into school and stab their friends. Oooh, that's what society is like today...
(brief pause)
I'll tell you what else we're not allowed to sell...
(she turns her back to find the list - we leave)
...gas fires, that's what...
(her voice trails off)